So. There are these folks on YouTube who watch movies and “react” to them. In most cases

they watch movies they haven’t seen before and, since most of these people are very young,

there are LOTS of old and not-so-old movies which they’ve not yet seen. 

Of course I realize that these are people who are seeking money and notice for a

minimum of effort. Still, I fell into a pit of them about ten days ago and have been drowning

in that mire ever since, watching oodles of the things.

Some of them I watched for two or three or ten minutes then decided, nope, too stupid

or too unappealing or too clearly faking their reactions. What I was left with was a series

of mostly women, primarily aged I’d guess from 22-40. There was a man or two, and one

older person but they didn’t figure a lot in my viewing. 

This was all interesting to me on a couple of levels. First, I enjoyed seeing how some

old movies would play to fresh, young viewers. Second, I found it interesting, and

sometimes appalling, what younger folks knew and didn’t know.

Of course, I don’t expect younger people to know everything I do about old stuff. I

was there for much of those times and saw it first hand. Plus, I’ve had many more years to

learn stuff. So I try not to expect too much from the young, but I’ve made note of some things

which surprised or disappointed me, whatever age they might be.

My plan is to spread this over three or four posts. This one will just cover a few movies

and a few comments for each. The next two posts will focus on some specific movies which

got a lot of interesting coverage from these “reactors.”

 

Most of these folk seem to have trouble with comedy, especially of the wild, farcical variety.

They seem to enjoy AIRPLANE, MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL, THE

NAKED GUN, BLAZING SADDLES, or LIFE OF BRIAN, but they don’t seem to entirely

get it. There’s lots of “that’s so dumb” and “why would he do that?” And this for films which

are intentionally sort of dumb and full of characters who do things for laughs, not because it’s

behavior expected of real world humans.

Sadly, when they do recognize something from an old movie it’s because “it’s a meme!”

Something they’ve seen online or parodied in FAMILY GUY. When they recognize an “old”

actor, it’s because they saw him in a Harry Potter or Marvel movie. 

A couple of comments from movies whose titles elude me. 

“Who’s Wyatt Earp?”

“What’s Ovaltine?”

I guess those are somewhat understandable, but still upsetting.

Here are a few things gleaned from various movies:

Life of Brian

I watched maybe half a dozen people comment on this movie, and the single thing which

surprised me most was that none of them seemed to recognize the Sermon on the Mount.

They’d say things like, “is that Brian talking?”  “some guy is speaking to the crowd” and

so on.  It probably doesn’t speak well for modern Christianity that this was so unknown

to all of them. But worse than that, it killed the comedy. “Blessed are the cheesemakers”

meant nothing to anyone.

Rear Window

The people sleeping on the fire escape confused everyone. Eventually, about halfway

through the movie, one person did say, “oh, it’s cooler out there.”  Actually, the whole

problem of the heat had them baffled. A couple of them, after a few moments of confusion

finally said something like “oh, I guess air conditioning was a kind of thing for rich

people.”

I shouldn’t be surprised that none of these youngsters recognized Raymond Burr, but as

a guy who grew up watching him weekly, I kept waiting for someone to say, “it’s Perry

Mason!”

Fargo

Every single person who watched this one was totally taken in by the Coens’ “true

story” notice.

“What is a Fargo?”

“Who is Paul Bunyan?”

“What is unguent?”

Pulp Fiction

A favorite comment from one person: when Mia Wallace volunteers herself and Vincent

Vega for the twist contest, one lady said, “uh-oh. I wonder if he knows how to dance?”

And, of course, the “he” in question is John Travolta.

Back to the Future

Only watched one of these, but it provided a favorite observation: About 90% through

the movie, she says, “so I guess this isn’t just a drama, it’s a comedy too.”

Young Frankenstein

In the same vein as the above. We had to get to the “werewolf” / “there wolf” scene

before she said, “Oh, I think this might be comedy.”

The Big Lebowski

Walter, played by John Goodman, is either hilarious or needs to “shut up right now”.

Die Hard

 “Who are Arafat… Gary Cooper …Roy Rogers… John Wayne” … the first three don’t

surprise me too much but…John Wayne? Really? I thought every American of any

vintage would know the Duke.

The Godfather II

The Senate hearings sequences seemed to baffle everybody. “Is he on trial?”  “Uh-oh,

he’s in court.”   I guess they haven’t seen much in the Senate hearing genre. For those

of us who grew up with Kefauver, Watergate, and Ollie North, we can only admire the

authenticity of these scenes.

Casablanca

First, the movie played great with everybody. 

Second, not a soul recognized Peter Lorre. One guy, reading the credits aloud, said

“Peter Loar”.

The reactions to Paul Henreid and Claude Rains surprised me. Everybody loved

Henreid and not just the character of Victor Laszlo. I always found him eminently

forgettable.

And all the women kind of despised Rains because of his admittedly vile habit of

trading exit visas for sexual favors. I’m sure that a lot of people were uncomfortable

with this over the years but forgave it because Rains was so charming and funny. But

21st century women fail to see the humor. To them he’s just a slimeball using his office

instead of Rohypnol.

So you get the picture. More later.

                                                     MY FAVORITE MOVIE

First, please note the operative word in that title above. “Favorite”. Not “Best”. Not “Most Artistic”. Not “Most Famous” or “Most Seen” or “Most Commercially Successful”. No, it’s “Favorite”. 

If you were to ask me, “What’s the BEST movie?”, I’d hem and haw, I’d protest that it’s impossible to pick out one movie as the best movie. 

Then I’d trot out my usual “Best” suspects: CITIZEN KANE, THE SEARCHERS, SEVEN SAMURAI, THE SEVENTH SEAL, 2001 A SPACE ODYSSEY, THE GODFATHER, or, if I was in a “lighter” mood, maybe DUCK SOUP, THE GAY DIVORCEE, SINGIN’ IN THE RAIN, ANNIE HALL …But then, after you’d backed me to the wall, “well, if I have to name just one as The Best, then it would be…DR. STRANGELOVE. Of course.” 

We could debate that. No one’s mind would be changed, but a discussion of artistic merit would be possible. 

But “Favorite”...that’s another animal. There’s no debate there. A favorite is a favorite, period. If you tell me your favorite movie is FINDING NEMO, I’d simply say, “oh, okay. That’s a nice movie.” No debate would be forthcoming. If you said your favorite was TANGO AND CASH, I’d probably give you a funny look, but…okay. If you told me your favorite movie was THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE, I’d nod and smile as I backed carefully out of the room, trying to find a safe place to hide. If you told me your favorite movie was TWILIGHT, I’d just say… no… sorry. There are limits. If you offered TWILIGHT as your favorite, I’d say, “what the hell is wrong with you?”

A favorite movie need not be a great movie. It need not be on anyone’s list of “Best” candidates. It’s just your favorite and pfffft, that’s that.

My favorite movie IS also a great movie, but I’ll acknowledge that it wouldn’t make my Top 10 BEST. Still a great movie though. My choice is Bill Forsyth’s Scottish comedy from 1983, LOCAL HERO.

Actually, “my choice” is the wrong phrase. I had no say in the matter. I saw the movie, I loved the movie, I continue to love the movie. It became my favorite, I didn’t choose it. If anything LOCAL HERO chose me.

LOCAL HERO, for those unfortunate enough to be unaware, concerns an American oil company’s plan to buy a small seaside Scottish village lock, stock, and barrel. The cool, canny, modern American businessman sent to Scotland to seal the deal becomes entranced with the people and the village. That’s about it for story.  The movie does have a wonderfully happy ending. Which is also heartbreaking. 

I’ve seen the movie at least ten times, maybe as many as twenty, including just a couple of weeks ago. I’d like to watch it again. Right now.

LOCAL HERO is a comedy, but the gentlest of comedies. I think there are some laugh-out-loud moments, but others may not bark a single giggle. I’ll guarantee you, however, that you’ll start smiling a few minutes in and you won’t stop.

But it has teeth, too. It’s not “just” a comedy. It has things to say, little bits of wisdom to drop, most of them tucked inside a tasty sweet.

I’m convinced that, in the old days of video shops, when clerks were asked for recommendations, the specific question which they heard most often was, “what do you have that’s like LOCAL HERO?” 

The problem is there’s nothing like it. The closest I can think of are GREGORY’S GIRL, the movie Bill Forsyth made before LOCAL HERO, and COMFORT AND JOY, the movie Forsyth made after LOCAL HERO. But, lovely as those movies are, they’re not really like LOCAL HERO. Because nothing is.

A few years back, long after LOCAL HERO had played the theatrical circuit and retired to the Home for Old Movies, I read a news article which related that the red phone booth which plays an important part in the movie had become a genuine tourist attraction. People would go far out of their way to visit the little Scottish village just to see, to touch, to have their picture taken with that phone booth. It was a palpable touchstone for those who were then and always lost in the movie’s spell.

None of us spellbound folk can ever get enough of LOCAL HERO. We want to live in that movie. We want to be in that village, meet those people, drink in that pub, walk that beach, goggle at the Northern Lights in the Scottish sky. So, we do the best we can. All those tourists travel to pay homage at a red phone booth. The more couch-potatoish of us just watch the movie over and over, always hoping that this time there will be more. Somehow there will be new footage which we’ve not seen before or, at least, some tiny incident we’d never noticed. Or, maybe even better, we could dream about the world of the movie. Maybe for one night’s sleep we can be among the population of Ferness, borrowing “tens” to make a call in the red phone booth.

One day, about thirty years ago, I got on an elevator here in New York to find one solitary passenger traveling down 29 floors with me. It was Peter Riegert, the star of LOCAL HERO. I recognized him immediately and wanted to speak to him, but hesitated. Maybe he didn’t want to be bothered. Maybe I’d be intruding. So we rode down all those floors together as I debated with myself--speak to him or not?  Ultimately I said not a thing. At the lobby, we got off and went our separate ways.  Almost instantly I was drowning in regret. It’s still there, that regret. Of course I should have spoken to him. I’m such an idiot.

All I wanted to say was, “Mr. Riegert, thank you for LOCAL HERO. It’s my favorite movie.” 

The first movie I ever saw in a theater was THE SHAGGY DOG in June, 1959. It was the only family movie outing we ever had while Dad was still in the family. After he left, we saw a few movies with Momma and a few with Dad but never the twain did meet.

From THE SHAGGY DOG on, I became a fairly regular moviegoer. For the next sixty years and a little more, I went to the movies. During some periods I went frequently, during other periods sporadically. But never, in those sixty-plus years was there an occasion when more than a few months passed without my trekking out to the cinema.

In my old age, which has been going on now for a damned long time, my viewings fell way off. Still, I probably averaged a movie outing per month, though occasionally a few months might pass without a moviegoing experience.

Then, Covid. So ya know. The last movie I saw in a theater in the Before Tymes was KNIVES OUT, January 2020. Then a long time passed till I ventured out for THE FRENCH DISPATCH and then NO TIME TO DIE. A couple months later I bought a ticket for NO TIME TO DIE again. Yes, again. That was late in 2021, maybe early 2022. 

Then…nothing. Time passed. More than a year and a half passed and I never went out to the movies. I kinda missed it. Finally, just last week, I walked the endless three blocks to Regal Cinemas to see an actual movie in an actual theater. ‘Bout time, bitch.

The movie was MISSION IMPOSSIBLE: DEAD RECKONING, PART ONE, which is just way way too much title for one movie. And I had a fabulous time. Popcorn and Diet Coke and reclining seat and a really good movie. 

MISSION IMPOSSIBLE, ETC. has, no surprise, sensational action sequences and a pleasingly convoluted plotline. It also has, of course, Tom Cruise. I’m certainly not the first to say it, but let me be the latest to repeat it, I think Tom Cruise genuinely is The Last Movie Star.

Who else can “open” a movie these days? Who else delivers a movie every year or two, no more no less?  Wait, you say, what about Tom Hanks? What about Robert DeNiro? Maybe Meryl Streep? Well, wonderful actors, sure. Formerly big movie stars, absolutely. But they all seem to turn out a dozen “movies” a year now, most of which never see the inside of a theater. It’s a different thing. Different animal.

Tom Cruise, The Last Movie Star. I stand by that. 

So, is MI:DRP1 a great movie? No, it isn’t. Great as the action is, lovely as the settings are, talented as the actors are, it’s not a Great movie. 

The action, naturally, must be broken every now and then to impart some information and, more importantly, to give the audience a rest. The problem here is that the dialogue in those breaks…not good. Sappy and obvious. A couple of decent gags, but, all in all, pretty rancid stuff. It’s almost painful to watch people like Simon Pegg and Ving Rhames struggle to make some turgid, fakey words sound acceptable.

Cruise and Rebecca Ferguson are somewhat spared those indignities. It even occurred to me that Tom might have seen what the dialogue was and suggested cutting some of his. Or maybe, “hey, why not have Simon say this instead of me?”  Cruise--no idiot he--might very well have managed something like that. Well. He was a producer, after all.

Anyway, very enjoyable action movie. Well worth seeing. Hugely entertaining. But far from perfect. And I enjoyed myself so much that I went back to the movies less than a week later. But that’s another story. A very pink story.

           Okay, I see Tom Cruise, Rebecca Ferguson, Ving Rhames, and, apparently, 
                                    Madame Tussaud's take on Simon Pegg.