Monday, July 17, 2023

                 CHRONOLOGY OF CLASSIC HORROR FILMS: THE 1940S

        By Donald C. Willis


I enjoyed Don Willis’s earlier volume on the Classic Horror of the ‘30s, and, guess what…I like this one even more. When I discussed the earlier tome I suggested that some of Willis’s prose was “stream of consciousness” or something in that area. This time around there’s not so much “stream of” whatever. The writing is smoother and easier to follow. Good move.


Willis’s standards for inclusion in the ‘horror’ category--just like everybody else's-- are pretty loose and lax..except when they’re not. There are quite a few films covered here which wouldn’t pass muster with my evidently more stringent requirements. But that’s okay, I’d much rather he cast his nets wide and gone, than if he squeezed out anything which might arguably belong. Better to haul in a few minnows than to let a juicy sturgeon slip through. (A fish metaphor--niiice.) Besides, all his inclusions are reasonable and understandable, meaning that nothing is covered here which has NO claim to the horror designation, just that there are some which I wouldn’t stretch to include. 


From my casual, non-careful count, 153 movies get individual coverage here. By my lights, 108 of those clearly belong in a book on “Horror Films.” Another 22…maybe. I could go either way. And then there are 23 inclusions which would definitely be exclusions for me. But again-- their presence here is understandable. They may not be in the ballpark, but they're in the ballpark’s neighborhood.


As the title suggests, the book proceeds from year-to-year, 1940 through 1949 with each film discussed according to date of release. This pattern allows the reader to look at what was playing when, what other movies opened at the same time, how these movies related to each other in time.


In addition to commenting on the movies themselves, Don also offers thoughts on other film versions of the same stories, and also on the books which inspired the films.


Willis has plenty of opinions, lord knows, but rarely are they sweeping. Very little “this is lousy” or “this is great” There’s much more of “this element was lousy, but this element was great.” This sprinkling of praise and pan allows almost everyone to agree and/or disagree with just about everything. There’s a lot I agree with, absolutely, and also a fair amount I don’t agree with, but only a couple of instances in which Willis’s opinion clearly shows that the man is a lunatic.


I won’t list the disagreements I have with Don’s opinions…with two exceptions.


He’s surprisingly lukewarm toward ALL THAT MONEY CAN BUY, which is widely considered--by me for sure--a genuine classic


And here’s the real proof for the sanity hearing…He names, as Dud of the Year for 1944  “Fox’s Nitwit version of THE LODGER”


So yeah sure, everyone is entitled to his own opinion, blah blah blah. But where this opinion is concerned, I have to ask…Gunga Don, what the hell is the matter with you?!?!?!


I will admit that, after reading that Dud of the Year thing in the opening comments for 1944, I feared what Don might get up to when actually focusing on THE LODGER. But, while he has little good to say in his LODGER comments, his reaction is really more “meh” than “bah.” He does term both THE LODGER and HANGOVER SQUARE as “weak tea.” Okay, sure. I got ya weak tea right here, Don.


I spotted a couple of elements of these films with which Gunga Don seems surprisingly, amusingly fascinated. For one thing, he finds great amusement, as I think we all do, in all those fake newspapers which earn close-ups in old movies.


And, even more, Willis is endlessly interested in and impressed by the “gowns” worn by our various leading ladies. Vera West might almost be the unexpected heroine of this book. Several times he adds, “fashion comments by Mo”. So it’s pretty clear that Don watched these movies in the company of his better half, who took stereotypically feminine interest in the fashions. Anyway, Vera West: Horror Heroine!


Some Willis-isms which tickled me…he lists several psychological horrors set in NYC, terming it “Manhattan, Island of Lost Souls”.


Referring to all the doctors in NIGHT MONSTER, he calls the Ingston place “The Old Doc House.” Heh. Good one.


Does a nice job of identifying Boris Karloff’s role in HOUSE OF FRANKENSTEIN as “monster traffic-director.”


He opines that, in THE MUMMY’S GHOST, it  “could be anyone--Tom Tyler, Eddie Parker…Cary Grant-- behind the Jack Pierce makeup…at odd moments it looks like it could even be Chaney.”


Discussing the questionable qualities of CAPTIVE WILD WOMAN, Willis asks the musical question, “what’s not to love here?” Oh, Don. Do you seriously want an answer to that?


“If the 1930s was Universal and monsters, the 1940s was RKO and mood, states of mind.”

I would probably have said “Lewton” rather than RKO, but Willis’s broader sweep is probably more accurate.


Most entries get coverage ranging from half-a-page to two pages. A few earn a little more. Five pages for THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY. 


ISLE OF THE DEAD at 5 ½ pages is the longest entry. This is a movie on which he and I are utterly in sync. It’s a great, too often-undervalued, horror movie. And he cleverly, and so incisively refers to that film’s climactic sequence as “The Seven Minutes”.


After telling us, of the Crime Doctor films, “One entry in that series, SHADOWS IN THE NIGHT (1944), borders on horror,” he proceeds to include two or three of them among his entries. He’s right that a couple of them do “border on horror,” but personally, I don’t think any of them really qualify.


He tells us that SPOOK BUSTERS opened just about a week after THE TIME OF THEIR LIVES.  Poor SPOOK BUSTERS…


He writes that the short story upon which BEAST WITH FIVE FINGERS was based was called “The Beast”. I just recently read the story which, in the version I read, carried the full “...with Five Fingers” title. I suspect neither of us is wrong here.


In a flash forward to the Langella DRACULA, Willis, obviously deep under the influence of hallucinogens, says the movie “saves the best for last” and actually praises the Dracula kite scene.


RETURN OF THE APE MAN:  “what can you say about a movie in which the actor (George Zucco) billed third in the credits is not even in it?”   Welllll…to be entirely, technically, nitpickingly accurate--Zucco is in the movie. For one short shot, lying unconscious on the slab. Once he wakes, it’s Frank Moran the rest of the way.


He writes that, in HOUSE OF DRACULA,  hunchbacked Nina “apparently dies.” Don is much more of an optimist than I am. His test tube is half-full. That girl be dead.


The book is pretty darn clean. I spotted only maybe two or three typos, and one of them might not be a typo at all. Might be an attempt at cleverness which didn’t make it. 


A couple of things which Willis probably did check on, but trusted the wrong web source: the plural of “bus” (as in a Lewton “bus”) is “buses”. Though some online places accept “busses”, the accepted (and proper) spelling is “buses.”  “Busses” means “kisses”.


See? Those are really tiny and really pedantic. That’s what I’m so FAMOUS for!


So, finally, congratulations and mucho thanks to Don Willis for this wonderfully readable, informative, and truly entertaining book. Full marks, old bean!


Sunday, July 2, 2023

I never lived in Indianapolis, but I worked there a lot and, hence, spent

a ton of time there between 1974 and 2013. So, I got to know a lot of

local names. Politicians, important folk like that. Probably the most

familiar name of all was that of William Hudnut, the four-term

Republican mayor of Indianapolis. I heard the name all the time, but

even if I’d only heard it once, how could I have forgotten that name?

I mean…Hudnut.


In 1980 I was in a dinner theater production of ARSENIC AND OLD

LACE in Indianapolis. Lousy winter weather held box-office down

a bit but we did pretty good business and got decent reviews

overall. 


But one day there was a by-God blizzard in town. Several inches

of snow, plus wind, biting cold, icy streets. Having worked at this

theater before, I knew that such dangerous weather generally meant

a performance would be canceled. But the day went on, the weather

got worse and worse and no word was forthcoming. I took it upon

myself and called the box office. I was informed that we would not

be cancelling. That was surprising. The box office lady, a friendly

acquaintance of mine, gave me the real scoop. Lots of ticket holders

had called to cancel. The producers wanted to cancel. But... one

group which hadn't canceled was a party of 10 or 12 reserved in

the name of Mayor Bill Hudnut. Nobody wanted to be the one to

call the mayor and tell him the show was canceled, but everybody

was praying that the mayor would call in to cancel himself. He didn't. 


Thus, the show went on. The theater seated 500 and our audience

that night was not even 50 souls. The mayor's party was just about

a quarter of the tiny crowd.  


It is very difficult for an audience to laugh and enjoy themselves

when they are surrounded by emptiness and darkness. And there

is almost nothing worse in the world than playing a comedy to

silence. This was going to be painful.


As the show started, not bad. Some laughs from the tiny crowd.

Most of the laughter, I soon realized, was coming from the mayor's

table. It soon became clear that the mayor himself was leading the

laughter. He was giving out with almost embarrassingly loud

guffaws, even occasionally smacking his hand on the table at the

hilarity. For a while the teensy audience stayed with him. Then, one

by one, they faded away till the only laughter came from the mayor's

table. And eventually -- still not through the first act -- only the mayor

was laughing. 


But his laughter got more and more forced and hollow. Soon he was

out of energy and could only offer weak little "haha" breaths, not

really laughs at all. Then...nothing. No laughter, no reaction, no sound

at all. We played the last two acts to utter, tortuous silence. By the

final curtain, we had maybe 25-30 people left in the house. But among

them, right down front and center, was Mayor Hudnut. He was gray and

slack-jawed, utterly exhausted. I looked directly at him during the

curtain call and he appeared to be in dire need of medical assistance.

He looked like a man who had just run a marathon on an empty stomach

after having no sleep for a week.

That was a long painful night. Acting never before or after felt so much

like ditch-digging. But I always held a fond spot in my heart for Mayor

Hudnut. He didn't have the stamina to go the distance, but by gum he

gave it a noble try.


I think it was his supreme effort at audience-ing which earned him a statue.


Friday, June 23, 2023

Late in 2013 our tour of SISTER ACT: THE MUSICAL spent a week or two in Las Vegas.  One of our backstage dressers (wardrobe people) there in Sin City was a tiny, giggly, little old lady (“old” meaning that she was probably several years younger than I am right now.) She always smiled and said ‘hi’ but I had little to do with her.


Then one night (October 20, 2013 to be really painfully exact), she came up to me backstage and said (actual direct quote): “I worked with Joe Maher at Manhattan Theater Club years ago. I thought he was wonderful and I think you’re wonderful too.” Then she patted me on the shoulder, smiled and walked away. 

Uhhh…………..what?

This seemed maybe the strangest thing anyone had ever in my life said to me. What on earth did it mean? What possessed her to say it? I knew that Joe Maher was an actor, but … so what? Tom Cruise was also an actor. As was Tom Hanks. And Henry Fonda. And Henry Irving for that matter. What the whaaaaat? I was utterly mystified. It occurred to me--swear to God it did--that the little lady might actually be cracked. Maybe her particular psychosis manifested itself on random occasions with random actors.

Then, many weeks later, long after we’d escaped Las Vegas and long after I’d forgotten the dresser’s comment, it popped into my head, a flash out of the blue. --  In the movie SISTER ACT, Joe Maher had played the same role I was playing on tour. 

Oh. Okay. Now I get it. Thanks, little not-that-old lady, you’re wonderful too.




Wednesday, June 14, 2023

BOND-A-THON: Reality or Good Intention?

My plan for this year--and you know how it goes with plans--anyway, my hopeful plan is to rewatch all the James Bond films in chronological order. Of course, it's now mid-June and I haven't started this, still hope springs eternal, ya know. I’ve done this once before a few years back and I think it’s time for a revisit and a reappraisal.

I’m a big Bond fan, have been since 1964 when GOLDFINGER dazzled me on the big screen, and I’ve seen all the films multiple times except for SKYFALL and SPECTRE which I’ve seen only once each. Definitely time to watch those again.

The listing below shows my own current ranking of all 25 of the 007 movies. I feel confident in the top few and the bottom few, but the 15-20 in the middle will probably see some shuffling about after I take another look. 

You will note, if you care to, that I’ve slotted the two non-canonical Bond films off to the side where they would fit into the ranking were they included. And yes, I’ll be rewatching those two as well.

I dearly love me some Bond and a series rewatch will be a genuine pleasure. With maybe a couple of dips in the journey.


BOND FILMS RANKED

1. GOLDFINGER

2. CASINO ROYALE

3. SKYFALL

4. DR. NO

5. FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE

6. LICENSE TO KILL

7. GOLDENEYE

8. THE SPY WHO LOVED ME

9. NO TIME TO DIE

10. THUNDERBALL

11. TOMORROW NEVER DIES

12. DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER

13. ON HER MAJESTY’S SECRET SERVICE

14. OCTOPUSSY

15. THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH

16. FOR YOUR EYES ONLY

17. THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS

18. SPECTRE

19. YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE

20. LIVE AND LET DIE

21. QUANTUM OF SOLACE

21.5.  NEVER SAY NEVER AGAIN

22. A VIEW TO A KILL

23. DIE ANOTHER DAY

23.5. CASINO ROYALE

24. THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN

25. MOONRAKER

It looks to me that the breaking point in the list can be found around number 17, THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS. Movies 1-16 are all movies which I kinda love, to one degree or another. From #18 down, we find movies which range from “okay but disappointing” to “lousy”.  THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS could fall either way. I’ll let you know after I’ve watched it again.


Thursday, June 8, 2023

                                               FIFTY YEARS AGO TODAY


Fifty Years Ago Today was Saturday, June 9, 1973 … The Belmont Stakes run today proved to be one of the most astonishing events in sports history as Secretariat won the Triple Crown by beating his world-class rivals by an almost supernatural 31 lengths… 



British writer John Creasey died in England. He wrote crime, science fiction, westerns, and romance. In all he produced over 600 novels under 28 different pseudonyms…



Fright Night on Channel 41 offered up a fun double feature this night—KILLERS FROM SPACE and NIGHT MONSTER. But they were both movies I’d seen before and enjoyed. Matter of fact my memories of the first viewings of both of them were fond indeed. 



I’d seen KILLERS FROM SPACE after school on the 4pm movie when I was 10 years old so how could I not love it? NIGHT MONSTER had come to me in 1962 on a Saturday night Shock Theater. My mother, brother, and I had watched Shock every Saturday throughout that year so, again, how could I not love it?


But I’d seen both of those (and I may have watched them again tonight, can’t remember), so my movie of the day came elsewhere.


Today’s movie was sort of a white whale for me. A teeny, puny, underweight  white whale, but still… Here’s how that came about…


When I was a kid, we had a local movie theater called The LeRose. It was a last-run sort of place which featured recent releases on their last legs and lots of fillers from the back catalog, whatever rented cheap. At the LeRose, from 1960-1963, I saw dozens and dozens of movies. Some westerns, some teenage rebellion flicks but mostly sci-fi and horror, tons of ‘em. Bright colorful new things like the early Hammer classics and plenty of those grainy, black-and-white, fun-in-spite-of-themselves sci-fi and monster epics from the ‘50s. It was great.


But not always great, I guess. Because there was a much too long break in the midst of my attendance years and I missed lots of movies I’d have love to have seen. There are a couple of possible reasons for that long-ago, months-long absence from the bijou. But…too long, too boring, not going into it now.


In November of 1960, I was a 10-year-old 5th grader at Ingramville Elementary School and I was smack in the middle of my strange hiatus from the LeRose. I’m gonna guess it was November 7 or 8, when my good friend from 6th grade, Steve, stopped me in the school hallway with exciting news.


There was a mouth-watering triple feature scheduled for the LeRose on the coming Saturday. Surely, he thought, I’d be first in line for such a three-headed wonder.  Steve was clearly excited as he told me about it. And it did sound great. It sounded like, very likely, the greatest triple feature in the history of movies. Showing that Saturday afternoon would be KING KONG, THE WASP WOMAN, and BEAST FROM HAUNTED CAVE.



I was still pretty new to the world of monster movies at age 10, but I knew that KING KONG was a really big deal. The other two were unfamiliar to me but those titles certainly sounded like the real deals. 


So, yeah, I should have been all over this but, for the undisclosed reasons mentioned above, I told Steve, “No, I can’t go.” Or something like that.


Steve was understandably dumbfounded. How could a monster-loving kid resist such treasures? How could anyone resist them for that matter? He tried, Steve did, to lead me to the righteous path, to make clear to me that this was an unmissable matinee. And he was right, of course, but I was not to be swayed. He didn’t understand and, frankly, I really didn’t either, but that’s the way it went. 


Steve went to the triple feature that Saturday. I didn’t. I would catch up to KING KONG on the late show about six months later. It would take me about another six years to reel in THE WASP WOMAN. But the third movie I wouldn’t get to see until, yes…FIFTY YEARS AGO TODAY!


On this day, Channel 32’s late movie gave me, finally, a chance to see …


BEAST FROM HAUNTED CAVE



And what did I think of my white whale that night? Well, it had certainly gone gray. I found it boring, cheap, insubstantial, and with almost no meat on it for a growing Monster Kid. I saw the movie a couple more times over the years and it didn’t get better. But maybe this time will be different.

——————————————————————————————-


Despite the fact that I am in the front guard of the Legion of Colorization Haters, I watched this in a colorized version this time. I didn’t feel good about it but there was a reason. Every time I’d seen BEAST FROM HAUNTED CAVE it looked so washed-out, so fuzzy, that it was often tough to even make out what I was seeing. So I thought maybe the colorization, however evil, might at least make things easier to see…


Right away, I notice that the dialogue is actually pretty good. Surprisingly crisp and natural…


After an opening ten-plus minutes of no BEAST, and no sign of a HAUNTED CAVE or a HAUNTED anything, the LeRose audience of which I was not a part probably got a mite fidgety…


It’s weird how the colorization makes genuine, beautiful locations look like oversized soundstage sets…


The colorization, by the by, she’s no good. It is amusing that faces frequently flip from pink to yellow with no notice…


One of the bad guy’s henchmen is always eating something. I know that trick well—an actor-y character trait which is a shortcut substitute for an actual character…


All that deep, genuine snow must have made filming difficult, especially on what was probably a 6-day shoot…


The BEAST, when we finally see it, is both laughably cheap and makeshift, and also kinda creepy at times…



I’m sure the snow made it tough, and the colorization probably didn’t help, but the day-for-night stuff here is ludicrously bad…


I just realized why this story seemed to fresh and familiar to me. I just saw THUNDER OVER HAWAII (aka NAKED PARADISE) a few days ago, and this is the exact same story, just subbing snow for sun and sea. Even some of the dialogue is direct from the other movie…


The kitchen and other interiors of the cabin couldn’t possibly fit into the cute mountain hideaway we see from the outside…


               Here they are sitting around the ol' cabin. Lots of sitting around in this one.

The BEAST looks like a mix of mummified corpse, giant spider, and a truckload of asbestos…


Well…it’s cheap and embarrassingly derivative, and has lots of other flaws, but it is very well-directed, pretty well-acted, and has a script which, though simple, is pretty much devoid of howlers. It’s biggest problems are that it’s kinda static and its monster is a wispy thing which is just sort of dropped in on occasion to justify the title. It’s no classic, but it is much better than I’d ever thought it to be. Why, I might even watch it again sometime.


                                                                    Bye Bye, BEAST!

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